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"What you don't want," she explains, "is one partner wanting to go out, the other stay in; one willing to talk, the other wanting space (and silence to enjoy it)." Susan Winter is co-author, with Felicia Brings, of Older Women, Younger Men: New Options for Love and Romance.She has been in several relationships with men up to 20 years younger than herself.Tessina, Ph D, a licensed family therapist in practice in Long Beach, Calif., and author of The Unofficial Guide to Dating Again, tells Web MD.For their part, the men like the sophistication and life success of their older mates, she explains.Though hardly a scientific study, the research surfaced three myths such couples hear every time: Winter is upbeat about the younger generations. "All they can do to get a woman is dangle their Porsche keys." As you peel back the decades, though, the men get "cooler," she says.

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"Choose someone who is your voltage type -- has the same level of intensity about life.

Those were the ages of Ashton Kutcher and Demi Moore when the couple tied the knot last year, making their highly publicized May-December romance official.

But even though their older woman-younger man relationship may be among the world's most visible, it's not that unusual anymore.

She works out a lot by her own admission (and judging by her track record in this department) and often meets partners at the gym, not the bars.

Winter tells Web MD that she and her co-author interviewed more than 200 couples for their book. Such men (at least the ones interested in older women) are stable and mature. They want a woman who knows who she is." Still, even Winter admits, this may not be for everyone.

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